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Tuesday, August 28

Faithful God

I love the Lord, for he heard my voice;
he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me,
I will call on him as long as I live. The cords of death entangled me,
the anguish of the grave came over me;
I was overcome by distress and sorrow. Then I called on the name of the Lord:
"Lord, save me!" The Lord is gracious and righteous;
our God is full of compassion. (Psalm 116:1-5 NIV)

Friday, August 24

Discomfort, Hope, and Hunger Games

My psychology book is so boring. Chapter One is so long; it's crazy. I feel like I'm making no progress in my homework. I still need to do a take-home quiz for psychology, but I don't understand what it's asking me. I need to write two responses for Women in Pop Culture before Monday evening, but I don't really want to do this homework on the weekend, especially Sunday.
But, I've also been thinking about the Hunger Games lately: mostly about Jennifer Lawrence, the girl who played Katniss in the film, but also about the adventure and terrifying thrill of being in the Hunger Games. One of my sister's friend's sister participated in a mock-Hunger Games with her friends. They wore those tags for the football game that isn't tackle football, the ones that remind me of middle school P.E. And they formed alliances and played dead, but really their Games didn't involve any violence at all. They involved lots of running and hiding and group-forming, and even Sarah, my sister's friend's sister, had a Katniss-Peeta-like relationship with a boy (not exactly like Katniss and Peeta, though). But, I want that sort of adventure and thrill and excitement. I think that's one reason I like the Hunger Games books and movie. Katniss experiences [completely barbaric] adventure that I never have to face. I mean, I would most definitely not like to kill other people in order to survive, but if I could emulate running in the woods and making fires and forming alliances and climbing trees and shooting arrows like that, I would really like to. I'm craving a mock-Hunger Games here.
But, going back to homework and the stress involved there, I know that Jesus is good and faithful forever. I would like to believe that more, however, and to have that truth always be in my mind.
A few days ago, I was worrying about meeting new people on my dorm, but I really didn't have to worry because He made me make relationships with people. And He caused them to form. He controlled who exactly I met and what became. So, praise be to God.
I went to Christian Challenge yesterday, and I really liked the worship and message there. It seems like a place I want to be. They desire to focus on Jesus with their whole lives, even though they fail and sometimes don't do a good job of it. And I think I want to be a part of that. I desire to have Jesus in the center, instead of me; I really don't want to be in the center. So, I'm looking forward to this process. At the same time, honestly, I'm afraid of being uncomfortable, but I consider the outcome will be worth the toil. Like Romans 8:18, "I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us."
I'll share that quote with my friend; we're both uncomfortable now, starting college.
So, thank you for reading.

If you have any desire to start a mock-Hunger Games, please comment below. I mean it.

Wednesday, August 22

Update

So, college. It may be too fresh in my memory to talk about it right now, although it kind of, sort of defines part of my life. I am a college kid. Oh, my gosh. I feel more comfortable here than I did two days ago, way more than I did two days ago, perhaps that's expected. I don't see my roommate ever ("Where are you, Makayla?!"). I last saw her on Monday morning. I would like to get to know her more. I think I would like to know some people more. Like this one guy today!
Okay, I hadn't read my Old Testament homework until this morning, sitting outside of my Arabic classroom bedore it began. But, this guy sat next to me on this wall-bench, grinning. He said to me as I read Genesis 1, "I like your book." I smiled and told him that I was talking an Old Testament class. He replied that it would be hard. No worries. But, this boy had such a pleasant disposition as he sat next to me, and even told a fellow classmate about his nephew, that my mood was good. He unknowingly shared a bit of optimism with me. And I am grateful. I'm hoping that I get to see him again, at Christian Challenge or something tomorrow night. He wore a blue, striped shirt with suspenders, a cross necklace, and some greenish Chucks. It made me happy. Father made me happy with him.
I was reminded today of putting my hope in Christ, not in people as I meet them. If I do, I will be disappointed and unhappy with them and myself. However, if I trust Him instead, I think God's going to show me how beautiful His people are and how to love them and be a friend or acquaintance to them.
I consider that I am not to the point of being filled with joy by simply loving on people; I'm still very selfish and it's difficlt for me to truly listen to someone without thinking about my reactions. C'est la vie. That will come sometime. I will learn, by His grace.
But, I am feeling lonely, a bit, so maybe I demand peoples' attention because I want it on me. It would be cool if I received that sort of love from Jesus instead of people. I would like that. And it would be, I think, nice for all parties: the Lord, myself, and everyone else.
Did you notice how beautiful the day is as well? Lovely.

Monday, August 6

Ladies' Night

It was Ladies' Night and it was alright. Painting fingernails and toenails, popping popcorn, and watching..."SLEEPOVER!" Oh, yeah!

Thursday, August 2

Writing, writing. Writing about what exactly? I'm writing with a band-aid on my right index finger, which is not quite nice and I'm making a few mistakes. For example, I can't really feel the keys I'm typling right now and am strugglling with not deleteing all the mistakies m I'm making to try to sthow you how badly I'm doing.
I had a quiet time earlier today and afterward I felt like today is a good day. I wrote in my journal a little, listened to some music, and then read Psalm 63. It's full of good truths, especially for me today (the last bit about liars is encouraging). But God made me happy with it, praise Him. Hopeful and happy, but I got frustrated with my mother and my CRAZY TEENAGE HORMONES (said in an "AHH-AHH" silly voice). But I had a bite or two of dark chocolate. One of the pieces I ate was from Dove and the inside of the little aluminum square said, "Take a deep breath & exhale." I actually took a few deep breaths, as far as my lungs would stretch, and exhaled. Later, I took a corner of a salted dark chocolate bar, thinking that, since my sister really likes it, I would enjoy it, too. I must admit that I was a little bit disappointed; it had an interesting texture and taste, but I think I like my dark chocolate smooth and plain, unless it has bits of orange in it.
I found out, after testing it, that my hot pot doesn't work anymore, which upsets me, especially because I move into a dorm room in two weeks. And, I like my tea! I thought that the outlet was dysfunctional, it's temperamental, but simply, my hot pot doesn't work. So, what will I do? Bah. I don't want to withhold myself tea because I'll have to boil water another way. Isn't it ridiculous that I don't want to use the microwave or stove to boil water? Spoiled. "I will make my hot water in a hot pot only!"